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My dad had been found dead in his car. He'd taken a hose, stuck it in the tailpipe and then put the other end of the hose into his car. He climbed inside and let the car fill with fumes and then he died. Had this not been earth shattering enough, for it was only a couple decades after one single gunshot awoke the family, my grandmother Bessie, with my uncle, two aunts, and mom, the youngest at age 10, all sleeping upstairs, as the sound arose from the kitchen. It was five in the morning on a weekday in the year of 1954. He had used one of his hunting rifles.
As a young girl, all I ever wanted was a loving family, as I was aching to belong to something or someone. Due my dad taking his own life, with the help of a garden hose and the family car, my reality came shattering down, allowing a fear of abandonment to rear its ugly head. Struggling to make sense of it all, I simply gave up, pretending like it didn't happen. A slew of tragedies became a major pattern in the fabric of my life. I must trudge on, although begrudgingly, hiding from trauma in my own self-made cocoon, only to re-surface years later, in extremely unhealthy ways, as an adult.
I am found at the onset of the story, running away from life's problems through various addictions. My childhood experiences could be to blame, but how would I even acknowledge that, for I had chosen to anesthetize the pain, simply choosing to forget the tragedies of my youth. Nothing can be hidden for long, so as an adult, disease makes itself present, knocking at my door, in the form of not one, not two, but three life-threatening illnesses, that I eventually overcame, most recently battling it out with breast cancer. Having so much to live for, including my loving husband and four adorable children, not to mention my only sibling, having died, just two years previously, I couldn't bear to let my mom out-survive her own two children. Faith in Family was to become her mantra for survival.
Faith in Family is an inspirational piece of material providing the reader with hope through tough times and joy filled days as well. Unique in the aspect that I have endured numerous battles yet triumphed through my love of family, either blood-related or community-based. In addition, there is a self-help portion included at the end of each chapter. I know this book will speak to your heart.
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