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Lunch with a Sociopath is a non-fiction novel which chronicles my struggle to recover after a cultic one-on-one relationship with an Episcopal priest who used thought reform techniques extensively. During the eight year period that I knew this priest, I lost my family, my children, my health, my faith, and very nearly my life. Our lives were so entwined that it was almost impossible to distinguish if my thoughts were my own or were his. We were enmeshed, and it was as impossible to separate us as it is to separate a blend of salt and sugar. How do you tell the difference? How do you sort it out? You don't. You just do what the priest says even if it leaves a bitter taste on your tongue, even if you recoil from it. Thought reform or mind control seems like something that only happens in a movie or a novel, but it is prevalent in our society today. One only has to look as far as the Catholic Church to find victims of spiritual abuse. While the stories of altar boys molested by priests have made headlines, countless victims are still suffering in silence. Whenever there is a power imbalance in a relationship, there is a danger that the person who holds more authority will abuse his or her power. It can occur on a large scale as with the Unification Church (the Moonies) or in smaller groups such as Heaven's Gate (39 members) or even in one-on-one relationships such as a priest and parishioner or a professor and a student. Victims of mind control are not crazy cult followers. They are people like me and you who have fallen into a trap set by a predatory leader. In my experience, the trap was built with trust and words and compassion which lured me into thinking that I was safe until it snapped down on me.
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