What can a parent do when her lifelong faith demands the ultimate sacrifice? What if that sacrifice is her own child? Upon receiving some completely unexpected news, L. A. Taylor discovers that the Mormonism faith tradition that she has built her life upon is now transforming into something else: a combatant who will wrestle with her until one of them breaks.

Settled by Mormon pioneers shortly after their arrival in Utah, the small town of Farmington grew to sleepy adulthood in long, luxurious stretches. The evils of the world that Brigham Young and successive Mormon leaders preached against were largely kept at bay for decades because of the physical isolation of the desert community. Growing up there during the pre-Internet era of the 1960s and '70s, Taylor and her peers learned that the Mormon Church was the "only true and living church upon the face of the earth," an idea that was not only preached from the pulpit but also contained in Mormon scripture. A solidarity of belief ensured that unseemly questions were neither considered nor discussed. Those who dared to whisper that the world might be a larger place than any of them had ever suspected were advised to keep their heretical opinions to themselves.

Against this backdrop, Taylor managed to push her doubts aside and conform to many of the expectations that her religion insisted upon. But as the innocence of childhood passed, the outside world intruded -- slowly at first, then with an inescapable urgency. When adulthood and parenthood arrived with all their complications, the author found herself pushed to make a difficult decision: should she hope for the heaven that her ancestors had long promised? Or should she look beyond that heaven for a greater truth?

When her son finally reveals his private reality to her, the church that has always offered up answers now gives only unhelpful guidance at best: Love the sinner but hate the sin. Rejecting this advice and relying upon the surest instincts of her heart, Taylor embarks upon a journey into an uncharted spiritual wilderness, seeking for a deeper truth. Along the way, the crux of the issue gradually becomes clear: in the ultimate battle, should a parent choose heaven? Or should she choose her child?

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• Biographies & MemoirsMemoirs

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